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[AU] Perfect [Male!Reader/Mikasa]

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                                                                                                            "You make me Perfect."
                                                                                                           "Tell my what can I do?"


                                                                                                  Male!Reader x Mikasa Ackermann

                                                                                                                          *

Three weeks had passed since the incident on the Rooftop, and while [Male!Name] and Mikasa had become friends something felt off to the [h/c] male. He never had felt like this, but he was sure he had a large crush on the asian girl. He denied that he might even be in love, he didn't want to fall for anyone, he lost everyone he loved before, so he couldn't risk loving someone he could lose again. He never wanted to go through this pain, not again. He felt bad about it, he was happy to be friends with Mikasa and he feared that his emotions might ruin this freshly build friendship.

On a rainy Thursday during Chemistry he suddenly realised something. During the course of the last Weeks Mikasa had spent more time with him than with Eren, so didn't that mean she was slowly getting over that Jäger-Kid? Maybe he had a chance? Blushing a little the male felt something hard hit his head. Glancing towards the Teachers Desk he noticed that his Teacher, Miss Hanji, had accidentally threw a piece of chalk against his head. "What a coincidence, since I hit you, do you happen to know the answer, [Male!Name]?" she smiled at the teen.

With a blink he began to speak, "Uh... Well..." and then he heard a soft voice whispering the answer behind him. "The chemical Formula for Phosphoric Acid is H3PO4. Three atoms of hydrogen, one atom of phosphorous, and 4 atoms of oxygen." he replied, and while the normal Formula had been the answer Armin Arlert, a small blond boy who sat behind him, had whispered to him the explanation of what exactly it was had come from him. Seeing as Armin was a kind boy he had tutored [Male!Name] a bit in the subjects he had been weak in, so as of now the [e/c] eyed boy knew the answers to most of Miss Hanji's questions.

Turning his head in the slightest he cracked a big smile at the blue-eyed boy, "Thanks a lot, Armin!" he whispered in a hushed tone before turning around, this time following the lecturing of the hyper brown-haired teacher, unaware of Mikasa staring at the back of his head, unsure as of why she felt jealous that Armin had received such a smile from the [h/c] male. It wasn't that she minded them being friends, it just felt weird for her to have the wish to be smiled at like this. It bothered her that she felt like this for [Male!Name] and not for Eren, after all she was in love with Eren, wasn't she?

The rest of chemistry went without more incidents, or at least none that would have been worth mentioning. As soon as the bell rang the teen packed his bag, ready to hurry out to get his math book. That was unless he felt a tug at his sleeve. Turning around he came to face with Reiner. Although [Male!Name] and Reiner sometimes hung out during Lunchbreak they couldn't really be considered close friends, they got along but Reiner usually hung out with Bertholdt, a tall and nervous male, and Annie, a stoic short female. So the fact that Reiner suddenly wanted to talk to him made [e/c] hues sparkle in curiousity.

"Do you have a second?" Reiner's deep voice echoed, and with a small nod he pulled the slightly taller male along. When they reached a deserted corridor of the big school building Reiner finally stopped, causing the [h/c] male to nearly bump into him. "So... What's up, Reiner?" the question came a little confused, normally this Corridor was known to be used by people to confess or have, well, other activities that involved 'Romance' so Reiner pulling him here was strange.

Of course, the brawny blond was a big flirt, but this was just downright weird. "Do you like Ackermann?" the question came in a amused tone. [Male!Name] couldn't blame Reiner for being amused, while he often got asked out, god be blamed for actually making him somewhat popular, he always rejected the girls. So if the [h/c] teen was actually interested in a girl it would definitely be interesting. Feeling his cheeks tint the faintest pink the boy rolled his eyes. "What's it to ya'?" he sighed.

"Are you dense or haven't you noticed?" Reiner inquired, surprising the other. "Noticed what?" came the reply as the brawny male let out a exasperated sigh, "They way she looks at you. C'mon, even I noticed it!" he snarled, punching the other on the back of his head, "Hey, ow- Hold up a diddely darn second, what do you mean by 'the way she looks at me'? We're friends, there's nothing more." he stated, feeling his heart get heavy by his own words. "Whatever. I'm a little jealous, to be honest, I wish Krista would look at me like this." the blond smirked before the other chuckled.

"What's so funny?" -"Well she does have that look..." the [h/c] male began, making Reiner look a little hopeful, "...for Ymir." he laughed before receiving a slap on his back, "Haha, sorry, sorry!" the other excused before looking at Reiner. "But say, why'd you wanna 'help' me with Mikasa?" he asked before it was Reiner who smirked. "Well it'll be interesting to see how the infamous [Male!Name] will try to woo someone." Reiner admitted before [e/c] hues glistened with annoyance, for a second he wanted to say something to piss the other off, but he was thankful to Reiner for giving him the information he had needed to make up his mind so he held himself back.

After getting scolded by Mister Rivaille for being a "late, dumb brat" [Male!Name] was deep in thoughts as he stared out of the Window. He was uncertain of what to do. Of course, his good looks would give him the chance of getting a girlfriend in no time, but considering they didn't know him it was a bad idea anyways. His feelings bothered him more and more and soon he unconsciously radiated an irritated Aura that stopped everyone from bothering him the next two lessons.

Naturally he had a scowl on his face which made his good looks be practically useless at many times. There still were girls who tried, but none of them understood him at all and it pissed him off. Did anybody even understand just how insecure [Male!Name] was? He wasn't the cool guy everybody thought him to be, he wasn't perfect like some had labeled him as and he definitely wasn't as special as others might have thought. He tried to not let these negative thoughts get best of him, but it still sometimes got to him.

As soon as the bell announced the end of his last class for the day he directly made his way home. No goodbye to anyone, no talk with another person. Deep in thoughts he sighed, he wanted to tell Mikasa about these emotions bothering him, but the thought of scaring her away with it was too much to bare for him. He was terrified of losing her. And then the realisation hit him. He had to tell her, otherwise something would go horribly wrong. And he knew exactly why. Pulling out his Cellphone he made a few phone calls before smiling tiredly, "This is it."

                                                                                                                          *

Another two weeks had passed, in those fourteen days [Male!Name] had only talked to 3 people, Marco Bodt, Jean Kirschstein and Connie Springer. Otherwise he hadn't interacted with anyone, and that bothered many. But one in particular. While she had tried her best to not bother with it, Mikasa couldn't help but wonder if it was something she had done that made [Male!Name] become so distant. She still was bothered with her feelings with him and she had no idea what exactly they should have been classified as, so the fact he hadn't talk to her in two weeks hurt her.

All the while she had been hanging out with Eren and Armin more again, and while it made her happy that Eren enjoyed her company again her mind still often had wandered to a certain [h/c] boy. Unaware of the fact that this certain male had often been watching her from afar, jealous of every little smile she had given her two good friends. With a small sigh she packed her bag and stood up, German class had just ended, thankfully, her mind was unable to concentrate on subjects as of late. Under her breath she couldn't help but let out a small curse, damned [Male!Name] taking over her thoughts.

As soon as she headed out of the room her sight was blocked by a [f/c] Jacket and a Arm pressing against the wall beside her head. Looking at the ground, seemingly bothered by something there stood [Male!Name], a faint blush tinting his cheeks. "Mikasa... You have to go with Armin to a place tonight." and that was all he said before leaving, left behind was a puzzled raven-haired female who could do nothing but stare after the tall male.

The entire rest of her classes Mikasa couldn't help but wonder what the [e/c] eyed boy had meant with she had to go with Armin somewhere. But when she had asked the blond boy he had only smiled wryly,  apparently not please to hear that question. "I promised [Male!Name] to not tell you until we're there.” he stated to which Eren had asked as of why he hadn't been invited there. And in that second a tall figure had appeared behind the brown-haired boy, slapped a small envelope against his face and left. All three staring after the [h/c] boy with mixed emotions, Eren angered but nonetheless curious, Armin shocked and a little desperate and Mikasa simply puzzled, a little annoyed by her friend once more having hurt her adopted brother, but not really mad at him.

After Armin told Eren to not tell Mikasa what the Envelope said the taller boy had grumbled but agreed nonetheless, a wry smile on his face. If [Male!Name] was able to plan something that made Eren look like this it must have been something very good. Seeing as they both were getting along nearly as bad as Eren and Jean. However, just the fact that it was Eren who seemed to be excited about it made her feel a little wary of the things to come. Eren usually only was excited when it either involved fighting against his most hated group of people in this school or if it involved his idol, Mister Rivaille.

And while the infamous trio was having a heated conversation, well, more like Eren and Armin had the conversation and Mikasa simply listened and sometimes threw in a sentence or two, [Male!Name] was sitting a few tables away and watched them, nervously biting his lower lip as Jean put a hand on his shoulder with a smirk. "You know, I should be mad at you for liking Mikasa, but seeing you like this is so hilarious I can't be mad at you." he stated, causing the other to roll his eyes, "Why thanks Jean, I'm so happy to hear you love seeing me being a nervous wreck." the [h/c] boy replied wryly as Marco sat down on his other side.

Smiling the other tried to calm down the nervous male. "Come on now, if you are so nervous you won't be able to do this tonight." he stated, causing a nearly invisible smile to stretch onto the anxious teens face. "Thanks, Marco." -"Hey! What about me?! I just told you I was okay with you liking the girl I love!" came the complaint of Jean. Chuckling softly the taller male wrapped an arm around the annoyed male, "Thanks a lot Jean, it means a lot to me. I'm glad to have you as my friend," and despite having been sarcastic before it was true. [Male!Name] knew how hard it must've been for Jean to accept his friend having a crush on the girl he loved, to accept the [h/c] boy planning to confess to her. "Whatever..." he mumbled with a frown.

                                                                                                                          *

For a second [Male!Name] leaned against the Lockers, closing his [e/c] orbs. Lost in thought he was interrupted by someone taking his hand and holding it up to high-five it. Opening one of his eyes the tall male saw Connie Springer, a hyper friend of his with a buzzcut. Grinning at him Connie pointed at [Male!Name], "Man, those clothes look super cool on you!" he exclaimed, causing a soft smile to spread onto the exhausted males Face. "Thanks, Connie. But hey..." he stopped before smirking, "...looking good yourself." he finished making his Friend smile.

[Male!Name] wore black jeans that complimented his trained legs, dark-brown shoes that fit with his pants, a white shirt and a black leather jacket. His usually shaggy [h/c] hair had been styled to look good, it was a little messy seeing it as Jean had said he looked better with wilder hair than a good little boy haircut. On his left ear he had put in two small earrings on his earlobe and a piercing a little higher on his ear, just to go with his 'rocker' look.

Pulling the other along Connie smirked, well aware of [Male!Name] still being very nervous. Who wouldn't? After all it had been over a year since their bands last performance. And today was even more special because [Male!Name] had even taken the effort to write two Songs, all just for one purpose that all the Band Members were well aware of. And even though Jean had been against it at first, now they all just found it adorable of their Bandleader, although they would never admit it, after all they were manly man, now weren't they?

After going a few minutes they finally stood on a dark stage, the crowd before it couldn't see them yet, seeing as the entire room was only lit in the back so that the stage wasn't visible yet. "Hey Hey Hey everybody! Welcome to the first concert of Freiheitskämpfer in a year! Are you all ready?" the announcers Voice was the one of Lars Bischof, a distant Cousin of [Male!Name] as well as the keyboard player of the band. Connie was he bassist, Marco the second Guitarist and Jean sat on the Drums, [Male!Name] was lead Singer as well a slead Guitarist.

Hearing the crowd break out in mostly cheering they all smiled a little before the concert began, the Band was known for their Rock-Songs and they had been a popular Band for a while now, infamous in a lot of places. But to speak the truth, all the cheering didn't matter to [Male!Name] right now, his eyes were scanning through the crowd as he tried to find a certain female inside the masses. When he found onyx hues staring up at him a little surprised but with a smile he smirked, now giving it his best.

After another Song Lars once again took the Microphone in his hands, "Hey everyone, did you know our Leader [Male!Name] wrote a really amazing Song?" he questioned, earning puzzled looks before smirking, "Who in here wants to hear it!?" he then shouted, making the crowd explode in cheering and choirs of "Yes!" and even making some girls screech. Sheepishly scratching the back of his neck the [h/c] male laughed softly, his voice echoing through the room due to the speakers in it. "To be honest I am a little nervous about playing it here, it's a Song I wanted to dedicate to a certain Girl that came here tonight... But it's really not like our normal Songs." he stated before the crowd cheered again.

"Alright! We'll play it!" he smirked, loud cheers errupting from the mass as he shrugged softly, "It's called Perfect!" he laughed before beginning to sing, and all of a sudden the entire crowd was silent. So was Mikasa, a visible blush lighting up her usually pale face. [Male!Name] hadn't said the name of the girl he had dedicated his Song to, but the smirk and look he had given while saying it had been directed at her, and this little fact not only made her face heart up in surprise but also made her heartbeat increase.

I nearly lost my mind,
Tryin' to figure out a way,
To make you understand,
I can't go on another day...


To say she was surprised was an understatement. Her mind was filled with thousand of interpretations for the lyrics. But one stung in her mind like a Bee. Was he implying that he couldn't go on with her not understanding how he felt? Had she overlooked hints he had given? Was he perhaps feeling the same way she had felt? Shaking her head a little her blushed became worse, he couldn't possibly mean it like this, could he?

Or maybe I was wrong,
Been confused and led astray,
Please give me one more chance,
Cause I can't take what's happening...


This made her heart clench, feeling guilty she knew exactly what the male meant. It was obvious by the pained expression that had haunted his face for a split second that he thought of her still liking Eren, his eyes gave him away. While Mikasa wasn't to well with emotions she was able to read the emotions from the males eyes, his [e/c] orbs simply gave it all away. And the thought of him being hurt by her liking her adoptive brother hurt her, of course she had been in love with Eren. But she had come to realise that she liked [Male!Name], not Eren. Eren didn't even appreciate her worries for him, but [Male!Name] always had, he always had been there for, had been kind and comforted her. And she had hurt him.

Have you ever lost someone?
Try to take it back but the damage is done,
thought of losing you makes me feel so sad,
How I'm gonna sleep when I feel this bad?


This part of the Song on the other hand made her heartbeat increase rapidly, not only from happiness about him admitting he was scared of losing her, but also out of pain. She had only recently found out about [Male!Name] losing his family as a child, so she knew the pain he felt, she had lost her Parents as well, but unlike him she had gotten a new home, a place where she had a family again. He had been alone ever since, and the knowledge of this made this Song even more upsetting for her. Especially since he once had told her that he had had a fight with his Sister and by the time he had realised he had hurt her it had already been to late to apologize.

I know enough's enough
It's gonna be tough to get through this...


This time she didn't know what he meant. She knew it must all be hard for him to go through, but what did he mean with 'enough's enough'? She didn't know, but she should find out soon.

I'll never be perfect.

He was wrong, to her he was perfect in his own way. The realisation of this startled her, shocked her.

I'll never be cool.

He was cool, always keeping calm during all the stress he had to go through made him cool in her eyes.

I'll always be nothing...

This phrase made her heart sting in pain, to hear him state that he thought this low of himself.

...Unless I'm with you.

And this on the other hand made her face explode into various shades of red.

Cause you make me perfect.
Tell me what can I do?
The pieces are missing,
When I'm not with you.


She secretly cursed [Male!Name] for making her feel like this, it was so uncharacteristically for her to blush so much, to lose her cool like this and to feel her heartbeat increase like this. She was scared he might have heard it, there on Stage from where he smiled at her, his [e/c] filled with so many emotions she couldn't help but feel her knees get weak. Damn that guy with his gorgeous voice and cute personality.

You make me whole.

This small part of the Song made her onyx eyes widen, was he serious? So he did feel the same as her? Part of her was relieved, the other part was scared, she had no idea how to react to this.

Maybe I was lost,
Maybe I was just afraid,
Would you please forgive me,
And hold me in your arms?


Was he afraid of her being mad at him for ignoring her for two weeks? Was he stupid? After he took all the effort to tell her how he felt? How could she be mad at him? But giving a light nod, although she was sure he most likely wouldn't see it, she decided to be there for him just as much as he had been there for her.

The Song continued for a while, all the while making her feel torn between being sad by the usually cool male admitting all his fears and losses and between feeling happy, seeing as he had just admitted he felt the same as she did, that he was happy with her around him and that felt complete with her. It mean much to her and she mentally noted to let him know so later. And then there came a part of the song that opened her eyes and had her understand just how important she was to him.

Don't say nothings perfect cause it isn't true
Everything I see so clear with you
Everything I dream of is with you
Everything I need is here with you...


And that was when she stopped listening, fearing that if this continued her heart might beat out of her chest. Breathing deeply in weak attempts to regain her composure she closed her eyes. As soon as the Song had finished the crowd was cheering louder than ever, causing an adorable blush to show on the Singers face as he thanked them. That was when Lars announced a small break and that he had another surprise for the crowd once the continued. Deciding to cool herself down the female made her way outside, head heavy with thoughts that caused her to feel dizzy.

Stepping outside she noticed she was alone, the cold feeling like a relieve for her, the cool air cleared her mind and relaxed her. Still a faint pink showing on her cheeks she sighed, "Idiot... why didn't he just tell me?" she mumbled, letting out a surprised noise when she felt a sudden weight on her shoulder. [h/c] strands of hair tickled her cheek as the tall male rested his head on her shoulder. "Because I love you and it scares me." and that phrase, so casually spoken made all her effort to calm down useless. While on the exterior she remained her cool facade her heartbeat increased once again as she simply tried to turn around to face the male.

"You don't have to be scared, you know?" she stated, trying to sound as calm as possible. However as soon as the boys arms loosely wrapped around her and he continued to have his head rest on her shoulder her eyes widened a little, and this time she was certain that he must have felt her heart race. "I can't help it. I always lose everyone and everything I love. I was scared I'd lose you too, I don't want you to go. I want to have you all for myself, but I am scared of having you hate me when I try to have that." the male admitted.

And that was when Mikasa felt something wet drip onto her shoulder, and she didn't need to look at him to realise he was crying silently. She didn't stop him, in fact, she was glad he was crying. He must have held his pain and fears in for so long that it definitely must be a relief for him to finally be able to let it all out. And not to mention that it made her happy to know she was the one he trusted enough to let her see this side of him. This vulnerable, emotional side that he had kept hidden from anyone and anything.

It made her cry as well, because she had made losses as well, she had held her emotions in for so long too. And then she felt a hand on her cheek, a thumb softly wiping away he tears that threatened to roll down her cheek. When she felt a hot breath close to her face her eyes widened again, she wanted to say something, but when she wanted to open her mouth she felt a pair of surprisingly soft lips press against her own. It was only a fleeting kiss, it lasted for a split second and it was gone as soon as it had come. But it still was enough to make her look up, only to see [h/c] orbs stare at her with concern. "Don't cry... It pains me to see you like this..." he whispered before she simply pressed her head against his chest.

He was worried she might be mad at him for kissing her, but then he heard her speak, "Then you shouldn't cry yourself..." she whispered, voice barely audible, she was scared that he might hear how nervous she was right now. When she hear a soft chuckle she looked up, only to receive another short-lived kiss that still lingered on her lips as she felt herself being pulled into another hug. "I love you, Mikasa." and that small phrase made her smile, because it made all her worries vanish in seconds, she wanted to reply but then [Male!Name] got called inside for the next part of the concert. Pulling her along with him he gave a happy smile, eyes a little reddened from his crying.

And just when she thought her heart could finally relax for a little while [Male!Name] went onto Stage again, this time a happy grin plastered onto his face. "Hey Hey! We have another Song prepared, this time however I'd like to dedicate it to my new Girlfriend!" he announced, his voice happier than before. The word Girlfriend made her face explode into various shades of red again, but smile nonetheless. She liked how this word sounded, especally when it came from the [h/c] teen. "This Song is called Always!" he replied and as soon as they began to play Mikasa couldn't help but smile. That was when she realised something, and her next action surprised more people than just herself, but who could be blamed for being shocked? It was way too uncharacteristical for someone like Mikasa Ackermann. With a loud scream she finally gave a reply to [Male!Name].

                                                                                            "I love you too!"

                                                                                                                          *

                                                                                               "You come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by seeing someone imperfect."

                                                                               "The best Lovestory is when you fall in Love with the most unexpected Person, at the most unexpected Time."

                                                                              "I remember the day I fell in Love with you."

A Sequel to my Story "Gentleness" (link below)!
Hopefully it's still going to be as enjoyable as it's Prequel.
Also wow Shoot me I sat 3 Hours straight on this and it has like 9 Pages in Word.

I don't know it was supposed to be Angst but it turned out really really fluffy.

I am still sorry for butchering the Character of Mikasa. And Reiner. And basically every SnK Character that was in this Story.

Also wow Jean is such a good friend.

I hope you like it! :)

Shingeki no Kyojin (c) Isayama Hajime
Male!Reader/You (c) Yourself
Story and Plot (c) Subaru Itsuki


Gentleness

© 2014 - 2024 itsubaru
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its awesome!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!